Got the Bird...Don't Fly Off the Handle

Do you ever feel like the world is flipping you off?  Such as, you are driving and someone cuts you off then has the nerve to go at least 10 miles under the speed limit while in front of you.  Perhaps you are headed to the checkout line at a store, and find the one line with only one person in it, then think, "Yes, I am awesome to find this short line that no one else has seen."  Then you realize that everyone else did see the line and noticed that it is not a short line because the cashier is speedy, but because the checker is taking her time inspecting and commenting on the items on the conveyor belt.  Perchance you have had a desire for an onion bagel with vegetable cream cheese and when you go to the drive through you are advised the toaster has been turned off 2 hours before closing time.  Then the next time you get the craving you go back and the toaster still has not been turned on...one week later...this time in the morning.  

In each of these situations, I wonder what Superwoman would do.  Well, for the inconsiderate driver she would be happy she was cut off since she is a skilled driver and would not bring an accident upon the slow poke.  For the cashier, she would be happy to have a moment to have a conversation with someone about nothing of importance like produce and cosmetics.  And the bagel, she would be grateful that the toaster was unavailable for use, as she knows she does not need the extra calories anyway.  Those are not quite the responses I would have.  I would remind myself that God watches over children and fools and would take peace knowing the idiot driver would be twice blessed.  The cashier, I too would hold a conversation about the air freshener or cheese that I am buying, because if I do not speak of my acquisitions I would be telling her to "stop manhandling my goods and pack ‘um wind bag!"  Lastly, I did experience the bagel flip off...literally.  The first time that I was told the toaster was off, I accepted it since I was at the store late and I drove away.  The second time I asked if the on switch could be pressed since it apparently has not been in a week’s time.  The response, "No.  Would you like to try a flat bread sandwich?"  To which I again drove off. 

Though my actions or thoughts would not be perfect, the outcome would be the same:  No car accident on the way to the grocery store; where no cashier was insulted in the line of duty, and Dunkin' Donuts saved on their electric bill.  I'm not Superwoman...I'm just trying to look like her.

 Word up...Peace Out--Susan