When You Don't Feel Well...Pretend You Do

So...I had a Hysterectomy.  Whoopee!  I told my OBGYN the "lady" problems I was having, what I wanted to do about it, and after 5 minutes of conversation I was scheduled for the surgery.  The surgery was simple: 3 holes in my abdomen/pelvis area, a little CO2 in the abdominal cavity, some manipulation of  funky tools and poof...uterus gone!  Then an easy recuperation.  Physical recovery about 2 weeks...emotional recovery...well that was never discussed.  I was the one who wanted to get the useless, painful organ ripped from my body asap, so what's my problem?  Hormones I thought.  Nothing a little increase in the Prozac won't help, but it didn't do the trick.  Add in a little more caffeine and that will keep me chemically energized.  It did, but after my work day ended the feelings came back.  "Crap" I said, "now I have to actually face these emotions and deal with them."  Since I'm not Superwoman I can't just get over the sense of loss and feelings of needing to cry a river for no real cause.  Therefore, I'm going to fake it 'til I make it so to speak.  I shed my tears, freaked out and now I'm ready to sell my stock in Kleenex and keep a smile on my face.  Even when I want to bawl like a baby because I'm one body part light...I'm going to smile instead!  I'm not Superwoman....I'll just look like her.  


Word up...Peace Out--Susan